Day 28: How do you dress for kink/BDSM play? What significance does your attire have to you?
Depends what I was doing before we got into it. There have been times when I have been completely dressed out for work and there have been times when I have been naked and there have been all measures in between.
I naturally assume a slightly different Dominant persona when I am in my work clothes, but in general I am who I am and it is more a matter of mindset and headspace for tapping my Dominant side
Day 27: Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?
Not typically no. Some of my interests being involved would be really really odd which is saying something considering the topic.
Day 26: What’s your opinion on online BDSM play?
I started my course doing this, even did some within the last year, but nothing substitutes for the real thing if its possible. That said for LDR or other obstacles, if that’s what is available to people I don’t look down on it. And its a great learning tool with lesser hardcore risk involved typically.
Day 25: How open are you about your kinks?
With people who share or at least have some insight into the scene and community? Decently, see also this blog and any email communication I have had with any of my readers.
With sweetness, completely. We believe in openness and honesty, after all how else can this kind of dynamic relationship work
General Public- Not so much, I may sometimes let it slip out a little, but it is normally played off as just my public persona which tends to be fairly vanilla Dominant anyway. If I was to say I am going to swat your rear to sweetness in public most people would presume it would be at most sex spanks not that she might end up tied, bent over, getting paddled or belted while having my manhood down her throat.
Day 24: What qualities do you look for in a partner?
To answer this I need only look at sweetness to be able to answer. That’s not to say she is perfect, in fact there are days when I sometimes even remove a few of these in my head and wishes for that particular moment.
My sweetness is a submissive that didn’t know she was a submissive until I introduced it and then earned her submission. She is a bad-ass, super intelligent and driven woman. Due to circumstances she was a second mother to her half siblings who nobody dares to call anything other than her brother and sister. It is quite likely that she could have successfully navigated her way through life and been fairly successful at it. She is the very essence of a Warrior Princess Submissive
The qualities as a submissive that I like the best are her:
- Honesty- She will appropriately be open and communicative to me about how she is doing and if she is in a mystery headspace she will tell me that too so we can figure it out together.
- Loyalty- She has stayed with me through hard and worse times, we understand that it takes two to tango and while I may be her Mister and she My sweetness, at the end of the day we are a team and we are willing to fight for each other.
- Sense of Humor- In my job the tensity can sometimes break knives with its thickness, so I naturally need someone who is willing to allow my natural sense of humor out at times. That said I have a really sadistic and wicked sense of humor that somehow, someway sweetness seems to find pleasure in. My sweetness is willing to overlook some of the off color I might let out and see the true Mister that I am.
- Independence- Before you turn off the page, let me explain. I do not find the idea of a can’t live or breathe without Sir’s permission submissive to be to my liking. That seems like a slave and I am NOT a Master. I like a submissive who knows and submits to the rules I set out. My sweetness has my directives and expectations and some general sense how I feel she can achieve those things, but at the end of the day she calls the shots for a large majority of her time solo. I like that I have the ability to get her to acquiesce if it is something I have to have done my way entirely, but knowing that when I am in the middle of battle she is likely going to be able to carry on without my 24/7 hands on involvement.
Day 23: Since you first developed an interest in kink, have your interests/perspectives changed? How so?
Yep, as noted back on the day asking how I found out I was kinky. It started with me just knowing spanking existed, then that it was normalish/more widespread, then I discovered I am not just a Top or Spanker, but I am a Dominant and that is just my evolution to date.
Call your mom and make arrangements, I am coming home early and when I get home I expect you to only have “the panties” on. You are to be kneeling beside the bed with your red cuffs on your wrist. Don’t worry about connecting them, I will take care of making sure you are immobilized and at my mercy.
So we are clear, I intend to mindfuck the hell out of you. You WILL be squirming, you will have your ass reddened by my hand and other toys of my choosing, and you will beg…well as much so as you can while you are properly gagged (don’t want the cops called again by the neighbors do we). The pleasure will be so intense that you will have to use every possible technique to avoid orgasming. Those are my orgasms and you can’t have them until I say so.
You have 60 minutes, don’t make me wait for what’s Mine.
Day 22: What do you think is important in keeping a BDSM relationship healthy? How does it differ from a vanilla relationship?
I honestly don’t know that there is much difference in terms of what’s important, but rather the importance is just heightened given how emotionally and physically scarring what we do can be. The biggies are:
Day 21: Favourite BDSM related book (fiction or non-fiction)
Umm I actually haven’t read anything I have liked particularly, any suggestions?
Day 20: Talk about something within kink/bdsm that you’re curious about/don’t understand
I am a naturally curious person, I honestly ask when I find something I don’t understand. One thing that sometimes gets my interest is switching in the relationship and how the couple if discipline is part of their dynamic addresses a mutual violation.